'Excuse me, Miss, would you please wear this target, too?'

Hey, all your anti-abortion nuts who like to make life a living (or, dying, as the case often is) hell for women who get abortions, good luck -- the great state of South Carolina is for you! Not only do South Carolinan lawmakers want to shield ye god-fearing folk from that nasty mistruth called 'evolution', the Supreme Court today blithely reminds us all that the same lawmakers are allowed to force abortion providers to copy or give up the medical records of their patients.

South Carolina wants abortion clinics to open all files, including patient medical records, if state investigators ask to see them. The clinic says there is no guarantee that the information will remain confidential once it is in the state's hands and no penalty to the state or its employees if the information is leaked.

Separately, the clinic says the regulation would allow public release of patient records, apparently including names and addresses, when a clinic or its staff is under investigation by state licensing authorities.

''Those proceedings are open to the press and any other interested persons, including those who participate in activism against abortion patients and providers,'' lawyers for the clinic wrote.

My friend over at Aquadoodiloop insists Columbia is a great town, and to be fair, it was quite lovely back when I visited a few years ago, but I just can't get an email reply I read recently in Mark Morford's Morning Fix:

To Marcus: Well of course my view of the great dust-choked state of TX is a little skewed. Rest assured, well do I know that your fair Austin and a few other hot pockets are bastions of funky alternative mildly progressive viewpoints and decent restaurants and low homophobia rates and lots of people who can actually see their toes. Thank the nearby universities for that. But mostly what I see and read and hear in the land where handguns are gleefully legal but dildos are a crime is noxious ultra-right wing anti-gay sexless ultraconservatism, with big hair and a bible and imminent obesity-related heart failure. But, you know, I could be wrong.

For the fine citizens of the Palmetto State, if you need help figuring out why I thought of this, let me know.