Sunday, March 21, 2004

For the Sports Fan

He's back, friends and neighbors. It is, as those of you in the States well know, March Madness. Some habits die very hard, including this one . . . Please join me in welcoming, once again, Silentio's own chief analyst of all things basketball for his round-the-clock (though, because I'm really bad about this thing, normally belatedly posted) coverage of this year's NCAA tournament. For those of you who care little to nothing about basketball, bear with me -- I've hidden in the links a few goodies for you, too.

* * * * * * * *

It's that time again. Madness has arrived! This year things are a little different. For those of you keeping score at home, I'm still at the photo lab, for another 8 days at least, until my company removes it and offers me the opportunity to run a gas station or interview for the store management-training program. [ed.: Movin' on up, it seems.] The B&W TV is nowhere to be found; instead games played while I'm working will be taped and watched later. And the Hoosiers, well, at 14-15 they're stuck at home with the worst record since 1969-70, two seasons before Bob Knight started. It doesn't get much better for the Hoosier state in general, what with Valparaiso being our only representative (out of a possible ten!!) in the field of 64. [ed. Cheer up, little buddy, you'll forever have Dan Quayle and Jesus on your side.]

So lets get on to what you came for. What, do you mean you don't come to this site for some guest editorial about basketball? B. actually informed me that he has received some Google traffic thanks to the phrase "Gene Keady combover" from last year's diatribes. [ed. To be fair, I probably got as many hits for the phrases "I love anal sex" and "B. is a pretentious bore".]

Round One, Day 1

Lehigh vs. Florida A&M. Oh boy . . . I'm already off to an 0-1 start, as this one was a complete rout by A&M. For those of you without a bracket handy, they get to face UK -- in the first of two games UK simply must win if Ashley Judd is to get to attend any games this year, due to her Broadway commitments that continue through this weekend. [ed. Is it just me, or is it really, really scary that he knows this bit of information?]

This whole pod system is still something to question. Pitt is #3 and their reward is playing Wisconsin in the second round in Milwaukee? Air Force (#11) plays UNC (#6) in Denver because that somehow is supposed to benefit Texas (#3). A more obvious gripe, though, is about this whole thing about replacing the geographical name of each region with the name of the host city. Is this so Billy Packer, ten years from now, can say that no #6 seed out of "the Orlando pod and Phoenix regional" has ever made a Final Four? [ed. In ten years, Billy Packer's most erudite observation is bound to be 'Applesauce . . . goood.']

Man, CBS has sold just about everything to someone. The "Dasani side court camera," the "Cingular Trivia Question," the "Sprite Re-Mix Bill Raferty 'Team X has come out in the man to man,'" and, I assume, the "Diet Coke w/ Lime One Shining Moment."

But this year I don't want to just make smart aleck -- I would use other words but what if the FCC decides to fine blogs? -- comments, I want to teach. [ed. Fuck that, dude.] So lets get on with it.

(Click here* to continue.)

* Yes, I only recently learned how to do this . . . would it not have been so much better to have learned it prior to last week's round of posts????